I'm in love with
by Aeth
Summary: Hermione finally confesses to herself that she's in love with Harry. But after that neither can she look into his eyes any longer, nor can she concentrate while he's around. Is avoiding Harry really the best sollution? Rated for safety.


AN: I never thought that writing HP stories can be such great fun! This is my second HP fic and I still have plenty of ideas in my head! But for now, this is for Harry/Hermione fans and I wrote this using my own little expierence. It's a complete fluff so don't expect much. And I have a little warning. This story is written in a different style than my first one, so please don't be surprised. 

Harry Potter belongs to J.K. Rowling, naturally. 

            **I'm in love with...                **

I'm in love with Harry Potter, wrote Hermione Granger in her diary, which then she closed gently and put in the drawer of her cabinet. She springed under the quilt and rested her head on a soft pillow, but still couldn't sleep a wink. All the time she kept thinking about what she had written, as if she tried to make sure it was actually true. For some time she had felt there was something wrong with her, but only lately she realized it was because of Harry. Everytime she was near him her insides were going crazy and she felt heat all over her body, and even if she tried to stop it with all her strength, she just couldn't. Common sense told her it was nothing, that she had visions or that it was just a simple crush, if she even could take that into consideration, she told herself it would pass very soon. Unfortunately, she was only fooling herself and that evening she realized  that she was in love with Harry Potter, her best friend. 

She woke up the next morning, opening her eyes heavily after a sleepless night. Her mind wasn't yet working properly and Hermione had a strange feeling  that something very important happened yesterday. She focused on a moment and suddenly recalled what she had done. Having sat on her bed she reached to the drawer and took out a thick notebook performimg the function of a diary. She took a deep breath and opened it on the last page. And there, in black and white was one sentence written by her own hand, which she kept staring at for a long time, trying to put all the facts together again. But she already knew there was no point in denying. She sighed heavily, drawing up a plan in her head that no matter what happened, she would never tell it anyone even if that meant suffering no matter how long, because there wasn't a chance Harry would ever love her back. It was a reasonable decision. She looked at the sentence for the last time and a cold shiver ran down her spine when her sight fell on his name. Right after she felt she was blushing and she jumped off the bed, trying to banish the thought she was braking down on the same sound of his name out off her head. Attempting to take control of her heart beating faster, she quickly dressed up in her casual school clothes, took her bag with previously packed books and hurried down the stairs to the common room.

Harry and Ron were already waiting for her and it came to Hermione that it must have been quite late. They both friendly welcomed her but the girl found herself unable to rose her sight on Harry. Of course she had told him „hi", but she looked only at Ron. In one moment she felt heat all over her body and saw that sinister inscription proclaiming in every corner of her mind that she was in love with Harry Potter. She had no idea that this confession, even if only she knew about it, would make such strong impression on her that she would have problems with looking him into the eyes. It was only then when she decided to forget about what she had written, and what only she knew about, and greatly hoping that her behaviour didn't seem strange, quickly passed them and left the room through the portraithole. 

It was Charms class when Hermione couldn't concentrate on her studies. She was siting at her desk, trying her best to focus on what Professor Flitwick was saying about battle charms, but everytime she raised her head from the book, her sight wandered to Harry. She descreetly observed him throughtout the whole lesson, absorbing every detail which made him who he was; how  he instinctively adjusts his glasses when they fell too low, how he attentively made notes, waving his quill on every side, how his hair fell on his forehead, how his beautiful eyes wandered on the class. When she looked at him like that she felt calmer than ever, and her thoughts even brought her to thinking how it would feel to touch his face. But she remembered not to stare at him too often, for he might have spotted her, so she turned her head round everytime he was turning his. She bit her lip for hundredth time, coming to the conlusion that she was acting like an idiot, and turned her attention on Professor, who was demonstrating the proper incantation for a stunning charm of a third degree. She still couldn't hold herself from looking at him again and felt that incredibly light feeling deep inside her. So she turned her eyes on him and with a horror worse that anything she had ever felt, she saw him looking at her as well. A huge blush appeared on her face and in an instant she sank her head into the book, trying to read a better sentence just to forget what had happened a moment ago. She didn't even wanted to look from under the book if he was still looking at her or to make sure she wasn't having visions. One thing she wished for right then was to collapse into the ground from embarrassment. Toward the end of the lesson she restrained herself with all her strength from increasing inclination to see his face, and when Professor Flitwick finally announced they were dismissed, she jumped up from her seat and hurried to the doors. Unfrotunately for her she heard Ron's voice calling her to wait for them, so she stood next to the nearest column, franticaly searching her head for an excuse to be at the farthest from Harry. 

„Hey, Hermione, why are in such rush today?" gasped Ron when he stood in front of her.

A mad idea came into Hermione's mind and she was just about to open her mouth with the aim of singing out her excuse, when she saw Harry, who slowly approached them and stood behind Ron. 

„I...um... I need to go to... to the library," she tried to say, strongly ordering her common sense to get back at the right place, but before she had a chance to finish she heard Harry's voice.

„Oh, that's great, we were going to go there also..." and he looked at Ron.

„Sorry, Harry, I promised Ginny to help her with her Care of Magical Creatures homework." 

Hermione tried not to speak anymore, so she just spoke about her doubts on Ron's teaching abilities in her mind. She clasped her hands over her books tighter when she heard Harry's voice again. 

„That's okay, we'll meet you at dinner," he said and waved him goodbye before turning to Hermione, who was standing motionless and looking with a strange expression at Ron walking away. „Are you coming?"

She turned round to him, tousling her hair to a mad flight, looked at his questioning face and reprimended herself for letting this situation get out of her control. A complete emptiness haunted her mind, when an intense blush appeared on her cheeks and the only thing which came into her head was a breaking  off „Yes". 

Harry lowered his eyebrows and with a slow pace started to walk towards the library. Hermione cought up with him a moment later, trying to be as far from him as good behaviour let her. She kept her eyes on the floor and fought with the eagerness to look at him. She knew she had to calm down or else the whole school would realize that Hermione Granger, the best student in Hogwarts, a bookworm and the last person expectable is madly in love with Harry Potter. Wait a sec! Madly? Not madly at all! Just... in love. She had to reach an understanding about her own feelings, work out some kind of plan and stop thinking about him all the time, about that he was walking right next to her, and if she won't think of something she would have to sit opposite him at one table for at least two hours, and that means not concentrating on anything but him, which leads to the fact that everyone would eventually rumble on how she feels about him, and for sure Lavender and Parvati, so that her life would be turned into hell on earth. Yes, she had to think of something definetly. 

            Soon she thought that she could forget something from her room and that she had to go and get it, but almost immediately she abandoned that vision for she realized that Harry would probably offer to go with her, which would completely ruin her plan. He was always so nice and helpful and that was some of the qualities she had unknowingly fallen for, but this time she couldn't let him flash that emerald green eyes of his and go with her because she wouldn't be able to control her feelings again. She couldn't also go for a walk because he would offer his company, and if she tried to explain to him that she wanted to be alone, he certainly would think she was acting at least strange. Thoughts bombarded her and suddenly her stressed mind gave a wonderful idea, when she felt one of her feet stumbled over something on the ground and before Hermione had a chance to realize what was happening she lost her balance and flew ahead. The last thing she managed to do cautiosly was to stick out her free leg for balance, which rescued her from a certain fall on the cold floor, causing her only to make a few frantic moves before she could stand straight. Only after a while she felt Harry's hand holding her arm for support. 

„Whoa, are you okay?" he asked with a funny face before lowering his hand.

„Y-Yeah, I'm ... fine," Hermione managed to answer occupying in her almost fallen books. 

 „You should be more careful," he said and then, much to her despair, he added:  „You seem so distracted today."

Hermione had completely lost her mind.

„No, I was just... um... thinking about this...work, you know, for.. um.."

„Potions?" Harry finished with a strange look on his face.

„Yeah, Potions," confirmed Hermione suddenly realizing that they indeed had a special homework for Potions.  

„You of all shouldn't be worrying about a homework," he said and pulled out his hand encouraging her to walk further.

            Suddenly Hermione remembered what she was about to say before almost stumbling. Avoiding his eyes by looking at million things that for sure wasn't Harry she breathed in and gathered her thoughts.                    

„You know, I ... I need to go to the, um... toilet, so you go ahead, and I'll catch you up later," the last words she said very fast.

„Oh, okay. See you at the library," he smiled goodbye and Hermione felt an offhand blush appearing on her face again, so she turned round trying to hide it from his eyes, and quickly walked away in the opposite direction, doing her best not to think if he was watching her. 

And that was how she spent half of the day; in the ladies toilet, hidden in a cubicle where no one disturbed her, thinking deeply that she must have been the stupidest girl in the whole world if she was hiding from the person, who was her best friend. She tried to think as rationally as she could, but she had difficulties in calming that strange feeling which seized her body when she thought about him, and even though it was pleasant it scared Hermione more than the threat of not passing a subject. Before she realized that what she felt for Harry was called love, she felt some kind of discomfort with a fact they were close, that he smiled at her in that sweet way, but she never had problems with concentrating in his presence or with looking into his eyes freely. And now, when she confessed to herself that she was in love with him, everything changed and she looked at him with completely new eyes. And that was the problem. She only had to see Harry again, the best friend imaginable, ignore her heart beating faster when he was close to her and start to act normal. 'Normal', she emphasized it in her head. When she leaves the place, she would go and sit at the table in the Great Hall, she would tell Harry and Ron that she had to think about some important matters, she would smile and pretend nothing ever happened. And she would feel good about it. So what she decided, she started performing. But only one small problem suddenly appeared. When she left her temporary hideout she realized that the sun had already set and that dinner, as well as supper time had passed long ago. She stood motionless, completely shocked by the fact she had spent almost the whole day in the toilet unaware of the flow of the time, and that nobody knew where she was. And then she just shrugged and went straight, leaving the courtyard of the castle, happy to be out in the fresh air alone again. Once again she thought about what she decided. She completely forgot about her classes, when Harry constantly was appearing in her mind and then immediately was forcing to leave it. And so walked Hermione, fighting with her thoughts, when suddenly Hagrid's modest hut appeared before her eyes with a welcoming bright light coming from the inside and dark smoke lazily coming out of the chimney. She felt her stomach shrinking and she remembered sha hadn't eaten anything since breakfast. She hesitated for a while thinking if she should go in, for she knew if Harry and Ron were looking for her, they certainly must have asked Hagrid, but the hunger showed a bigger sign of itself and Hermione made a few shy steps forward. She knocked at the door a couple of times, praying that Harry wasn't there, and then she heard door handle turn and a curious face of Hagrid appeared. 

„Hi, Hagdrid," she said in a strangely weak voice.

„Hemione!" roared Hagrid, letting her inside. „Where have yeh been all day?! Everybody was worryin' 'bout yeh!" 

„I'm sorry, I was just ... thinking about some important things, you know, the exams... and I must have lost the track of time...," she tried to explain.

Hagrid didn't answer but asked her to the table and with a warm smile stated that she must have been hungry. He put before Hermione a large piece of pie and encouraged her to eat.

„Wow, Hagrid, you made a pie?" she said, feeling she was returning to her old self. Before she waited for his answer she sank her fork into the pie and put a piece into her mouth. She tasted it for a few seconds and then, with a happy expression on her face, announced that it was delicious and began to eat. Hagrid, who was observing her all the time, scared of her reaction, having heard she liked it he smiled widely and sat at the table opposite her and also began to eat. 

For a few minutes they eated in silence. A light rain started to fall.

„Thanks, Hagrid, it was really delicious," she said putting her fork away.

„Glad I could help." 

His big eyes lightened up for a moment but then he scowled and made a worried face. 

„It's a lil' unusual that yeh have missed the classes, Hermione."

Hermione suddenly forgot how to breath when she realized she had sank into her thoughts so deeply that she had forgotten about the classes! 'How could this happen?' she asked herself. 'When did that happen?'. She must have made a very puzzled face, because Hagrid spoke again. 

„Is there somethin' troublin' yeh?"

She blushed unintentionally, trying to find some reasonable answer. 

„Why would you think there is something troubling me?" she finally asked. 

„Hermione," he sighed.  „I can see when my friends have problems."

„No, Hagrid, you're getting it wrong. I told you I was worrying about the... the exams and ... about my missing classes, it's just that... that," she broke off and looked at Hagrid. „I just needed a break," she finished not entirely sure about her actions.

„An' what was the reason of avoidin' Harry?" 

„What?"  she asked, completely astonished. „I wasn't avoiding Harry. Was that what he had told you?"

„He told me you were to learn in the library together and that you went to the toilet and that was the last time he saw you," said Hagrid, rising his eyebrows.

„I- It's not like that, really..." Hermione felt like she was burning from the inside.

            „Well, it seems yeh'll have the chance to explain everythi' ter him. He's just comin' here," he said and stood up to walk to the door. 

            „What?" asked Hermione for the second time, hardly gasping for air and before she tought about it again, she found herself under the table, clasping her fingers.

„Hermione, what are yeh...?" 

That was all Hagrid managed to say because second later a knock was heard and Hermione watched from under the table how he opened the door. She saw Harry, or rather his legs, holding a large, black and wet umbrella. He greeted Hagrid and Hermione strangely trembled at the sound of his voice. 'What am I doing? I'm seventeen years old and I'm hiding from Harry under a table! I'm so stupid!'

„Has Hermione been here?" he asked, concern in his voice. 

„Actually, yes, Harry. She's here."

„She is?"

She didn't hear what Hagrid then said, but she saw Harry made two steps in her direction and then kneeled, bending down to look under the table. Hermione found his green eyes staring straight at her and felt a wave of heat flooding all of her body.

„Hermione, what are you doing under a table?" he asked slowly, and his face had the expression of an enigmatic care.

„Nothing...actually..." she answered but her voice refused her obedience so she had to clear her throat. „I just thought I... would go here, and... um... help Hagrid with his cleaning," she looked at the floor she was sitting on, took a corner of her school robe in her fingers and begun to scrub the floor, thinking she was a complete idiot. 

„Cleaning?" asked Harry as if he tried to assure himself that he heard her correctly.

„Y-Yes," she hesitated, keeping all of her attention on the floor. 

„Come on," he said and Hermione saw his extended hand. She swallowed. Feeling her heart beating faster and being scared of her own reaction to his touch, she slowly gave up and put her hand on his palm. She felt his hand on hers and he pulled her up lighly, making her come out from the table. She knew she was blushing furiously and after few seconds, to her relief, her hand was free. Immedietaly she began dusting off her robes, which she knew she must have been dirty, but she was doing it mainly to avoid both Harry's and Hagrid's eyes. She then took her forgotten books from the table and held onto them tighly, when she saw Harry take off his coat. 

„Here, take this," he said putting it around Hermione's shoulders, who felt an cold shiver running down her body when his hands were inches away from her face. „It's a little cold outside".

„Thanks, Hagrid." Harry turned to Hogwart's gamekeeper, who was standing quietly aside, absorbing the scene taking place right before his eyes.

„Anytime, Harry."

Hermione tried to say something for goodbye but still couldn't concentrate, so she gave him an uncertain smile and waved her hand. 

„Bye, Hermione," smiled Hagrid. 

Harry opened the door and put up his umbrella and suddenly it came to Hermione that he had only one umbrella, which meant it necessary of walking together under one umbrella, which also meant she would have to walk really close to him. She would have to focus really hard, and try not to think about him, because she herself had no idea what was she capable of in this condition. But the rain started to pour really heavy and it was indeed cold, so she gave up thinking about some reasonable sollution not to have to go through all these strange feelings during their long walk to the castle. She couldn't also remind herself any usable spell and few moments later she was walkin beside Harry, who was oddly silence, under one umbrella, hearing only the sound of raindrops reflecting on its surface.

„Are you mad at me, Hermione?" she heard his quiet voice after some time.

'Mad?' She tought. 'How could I possibly be mad at you?'

„No, Harry... what made you think that?

He sighed. 

„Well, you ran away so quickly, and then you were avoiding me the whole day, so I thought I did something that may have upset you." 

Harry looked at her and she felt she was blushing again.

            „I ... I wasn't avoiding you, really, I was just worrying about the... exams, and homework..." she answered, desperate to continue her rumbling as long as necesary. She glanced secretly at him and saw him looking at her, so she quickly turned her head and with the stubborness of a mianiac begun to watch the grass. Harry didn't speak again trough the whole distance to Gryffindor Tower, for which Hermione was greatly thankful. When they entered the common room the pleasant warmth coming from the fireplace made Hermione feel sleepy. There was no one else in the room and she seriously started to think about the time, but she felt Harry leading her upstairs to the dormitories and she was no longer resisting, for the prospect of a healthy sleep was more than tempting. 

            They stood before the doors to girls' rooms. Hermione, in spite of inner resistances not to look at him anymore, decided to say goodbye to him, for it would be rude of her if she just disappeared behind the door. She turned around and opened her mouth. 

            „Well then, goodnight Ha.." was all she managed to say, before she realized Harry was standing very close to her, too close to her, and with a mysterious smile leaning over her. Losing her breath she felt his soft lips on hers in one, delicate and short kiss. When he pulled back slowly, Hermione, completely shocked, managed only to whispher „rry". Harry smiled lightly at her reaction, making Hermione almost fall to the ground, because her legs suddenly refused to obey her will.

            „Goodnight, Hermione," he said and walked away, not looking back, to his room.

            Hermione was left alone in a state of complete shock. She leaned heavily on the door and after pushing the door handle with her elbow she stepped into the corridor. She didn't even notice when she found herself in her own warm bed. She fell asleep almost immedietly, still with his coat over her shoulders, dreaming about this one incredible moment when his lips touched hers.

             Oh, yes, she was in love with Harry Potter. And she was the happiest girl in the world. 

So what do you think? My friend, who had read this before I posted it here told me, that I had exaggerated a little bit with the table thing. Well, I don't know if that's true, but when hormones start to play tricks on us, you don't know what can happen, do you?

Please review!!


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